Froth and Fury

It was a wintry afternoon. Most students in our
Darjeeling school bunked classes to frolic at the Winter
Festival. Seeing a virtually empty class room, the Rev.
Martin Gauss, the House Master, stopped dead in his
tracks. 

"Hey! Where's everybody?" he asked. "How
irresponsible! You know, this is really getting.too
much...! Well, I guess we'll just have to start without
the others. The course must be completed this month."
It was obvious he was quite irritated. 

Seating himself, he opened his dog-eared diary.
After squinting at the contents for a few moments he
looked up at me. Clearing his throat, he asked, "Do
you know anything about a fire extinguisher?" 
Wonder struck, I goggled at him through Billy
Bunter style spectacles. 

"Come! come!" he said encouragingly, "Surely you
know what it is. Tell me, how would you put out a
fire?" 

Seeing my lips quiver, he continued eagerly, "Yes!
Yes! Out with it. How would you douse a fire?" 
"By calling the fire brigade!" was the prompt
answer. 

"No! No!" groaned Mr. Gauss, "Before that,
wouldn't you do something else...well what is that 
something... my boy, what is that something?" By
now his voice was a whimpering whine. 
My face creased into a broad smile. "Well, I would
yell out 'Fire Sir!' " 

Snorting in disgust, Mr. Gauss shut the diary with
a bang and looked frantically around for something.
Then, grabbing my wrist firmly, he marched out of the
room. 

Outside, in the verandah, he pointed to a bright red
conical contrivance mounted on the wall. "That, my
boy, is a fire extinguisher...." he drilled into my ears. 
Feeling that some reaction was necessary, I exclaimed,
"Ah! how beautiful, Sir!"

Mr. Gauss lifted the extinguisher off its mount,
awkwardly staggering under its weight. He laboriously
began explaining the principle on which it worked. 
'Listen carefully," he said in a matter of fact tone.

"If this is inverted, and the knob, can you see it, come
closer.. .yes, and that knob hit hard on the ground, a
jet will shoot out of the nozzle...!" 
"A jet, Sir!" I interrupted, "A real jet!"
"Yes, a jet.. .of foam.. .which when directed on 
the fire will cut the air supply off and smother the
flames.... Got it! Now repeat the whole procedure
to me." 

Satisfied with my theoretical knowledge, he passed
the apparatus to me and asked me to handle it. No
sooner had I taken hold of it than the wretched thing
slipped out of my hands. It hit the ground with a loud
clang, the knob end landing first. 

Instantly a thick foamy jet ejected straight out of
the nozzle and travelled a considerable distance onto
the wall opposite—splattering it with thick foam. 
The loud swishing sound made me recoil in fright,
quivering all over like an aspen leaf in a storm. I gaped 

open mouthed at its amazing power.
A quick glance at Mr. Gauss's face revealed it to be 
forbodingly dark with pent up anger. That only served
to further unnerve me. 

Blurting out a "Very sorry, Sir!" I stooped to lift
the messy extinguisher. But my diffident handling
merely resulted in the forceful jet forming random
figures in foam on the wall. Providentially, the foamy
artistry stopped just short of my teacher's semi-bald
head. 

Tears welled up in my eyes. Everything seemed to
be jinxed. After all, was I not trying my best to make
good the damage done? But whatever I did was going
awry. 

While attempting to realign the nozzle, 1 was
drenched in foam and felt miserable. 
At this juncture, a voice like a cannon blast boomed
out. "You blundering dolt, get onto the street
immediately." 

Eyes smarting, I staggered along, carrying the heavy
equipment. By now the jet was becoming less forceful.
But it still foamed and frothed like an angry bull. 
On reaching the gate, I tried to prevent further
damage, by directing the frothing nozzle towards the
sidewalk. An unwary walker was caught smack on his
chest. Stunned to a halt, he shouted, "Oi! what

the...!" 

Before he could complete the sentence, he was

transformed into a trembling, creamy yellow foaming

mass. The miserable man whimpered something which 

sounded like, 'Glob. Glob... Gob... Gob., ob"!

Then, turning tail, the helpless victim took to his 

heels, looking like a giant-sized lemon blancmange.

Uncontrolled laughter caused me to drop the 

extinguisher again. Anyway it seemed to have served 

its purpose. Now was the time to wipe my foamed1 

face.

Just then a strident voice was heard, "Come over 

here. I've found the drain...."

Jerking up the spent extinguisher, I broke into a 

run. On reaching a ramp near the drain, I slipped on

the foam and slid until stopped by an exasperated

Mr Gauss. 

Snatching the misspent extinguisher out of my

hands, he threw it into the drain, quite suffocating

it 

Heaving a long sigh of relief, he turned round. But,

I was aheady away like a bat out of hell!